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Lesson 29
I have spent endless hours contemplatinghow I found the spiritual strength to break my Self’s final set of chains that November morning. My best assessment is that I had reached Grace’s tipping point after hitting an internal this far and no farther moment of spiritual catharsis. My version of Jobrefused to take another step without first ensuring it would be gracefully smooth.
Lesson 30
I define “acceptance,” at least honest acceptance, as a synonym for surrender. By surrendering my Self-will, I have accepted the terms by which I am obligated to live going forward.A business transaction requires acceptance prior to consummation. Without the quality of acceptance, I have more work to do, assuming I want the deal.
Lesson 31
Throughout adulthood, I was sadly one of those who existed within the framework of“I am my feelings.”How Iexpressed my emotions defined what others saw. Such an approach to self-presentation served me aboutas well as that old LA philosophy, “You are your car.” In a one-dimensional world such as California’s land of fallen angels can so often be, what one chooses to project determines his or her image.
Lesson 32
With my Self’s presence in my day-to-day life minimized, any desire to participate in external conflict seemed pointless. But I also knew the war with the Self would never end. Holding on to the Grace I had found would require my constant vigilance. The moment I stop living conscientiously, my Self wastes no time reengaging. By donning the mantle of Grace’s spiritual warrior before starting each day, I receive much needed protection.
Section VIII Preview
The rewards I’ve experienced since finding my way to a state of Grace cannot be properly measured. My spirit and I are one. Finding a lastingalignment with my TrueIdentity not only facilitated my life’s greater happiness, but also opened new doors to share it.
Lesson 33
Despite its many pitfalls, I am extremely grateful for the life I have lived, andI’m especially blown away by its joyful conclusion. Twelve to fifteen years ago, I would have described my time on earth as an utter failure, external conquests notwithstanding. In a variety of ways, my life’s journey hadseemingly lost its integrity, becoming one of despair.
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